www.becominghealthy.co.nz
I remember as a child hearing the quote “all that glitters is not gold” and thinking ‘that’s me’. Pretty on the outside and horrible inside. I know now that the quote was not talking about my internal health however as a child I never separated internal physical health from internal emotional or mental health. Now it seems that it is quite a relevant quote to sum up the state of health many of our children, and adults, have. What may surprise many is that these childhood thoughts, and actions, can have long lasting implications and effect how we live, our health and our weight as adults.
In the imagine conscious and media bombarded world we live in, many children are unhappy with how they look[i] or feel and while the information how to change things is easily accessible by adults, who may or may not pass it on, there is also a constant bombardment of fat and additive laden treats, undersized models, negative messages about the state of the world, over sized meal proportions and even sugary medicines. As the generations go by we have more and more options about what is best for our children however it seems that the impact of these choices is thought about less and less. Just how do we find that balance for our future generations so that we are doing our best to empower them to feel happy with whom they are and be healthy on the inside? Children, who are still so vulnerable in many ways, are quick to mimic actions and form opinions (both about themselves and the world) based on what is happening around them and how people treat them. For these reasons, non-evasive, subtle and positive methods need to be used, when working on problems, so that no stigma occurs and the child is able to ‘move on’ without feeling that an issue, which was just a normal part of growing up and learning, is a defining moment for them.
Research is beginning to give an insight into how important it is to establish and maintain good emotional, mental and physical health for children. An example of this is a New Zealand study which followed children born between April 1972 and March 1973 and found that those who spent a lot of time in front of the TV as a child were more likely to be overweight and have poor fitness as an adult.[ii] There is also recent research into the links between technology (computer, TV and other multimedia) and delays in language development. Watching TV before the age of two can affect the ability of a child to concentrate and lead to obesity.[iii] Children aren’t adults even though they are very good at mimicking adult behaviours, and as such they shouldn’t be expected to live how we do. What happens in childhood creates the adults we are – for better or worse.
A separate English study of 6,500 participants found 10-year-olds with emotional problems, particularly low self esteem, tended to be fatter as adults and the effect was particularly true for girls.[iv] Those with a lower self-esteem, who felt less in control of their lives, and who worried often were more likely to gain weight over the next 20 years. It is becoming an ever increasing vicious circle of unhappy, underactive and overweight children turning into even more unhappy, overweight adults. At some point it has to be dealt with and all research points to the childhood years as being an important pre-determiner to weight and happiness in adulthood. The statistics further prove that the cycle will continue, unless we intervene, as the weight of our children internationally steadily increases; New Zealand statistics show that one in five children are overweight (20.9%),[v] USA rates of childhood obesity have more than doubled in the last 25 years, more than doubled in England in the last 10 years, and increased fourfold in Egypt over the last 18 years.[vi]
So much focus is put on eating healthy food along with moderate exercise, and rightly so, however as the diet industry pumps out diet plan after diet plan, and increases its profits, populations continue to get larger, sicker and unhappier about their appearance.[vii] Could it be that food and exercise are not the complete answers to maintaining good health? As we have read, studies show that being overweight as an adult may have more to do with your childhood than anything that you are doing as an adult so this is where we need to focus - childhood. It is not about feeding our kids and letting them out for a run about every now and again, it is about feeding our kids well and ensuring that their daily requirements of nutrients, vitamins, proteins and carbohydrates are meet to enable them to learn, think, play and enjoy life. This should be a birthright – good nutrition, fresh air and a supportive environment to grow in. Aside from the nutritional content of meals it is important for children to have moderate food intake; healthy meals and smaller proportions, with an option for more if they are still hungry; it is a very basic and also a very important step which parents can take. Whole foods should be centre stage in any child’s eating and the fewer ingredients in any one item the better. Healthy amounts of activity, at least one hour of physical activity a day for 5-18 year olds and three hours per day for under 5’s[viii], good nutrition and a good emotional state of wellbeing are vital in raising children who are ‘well’ and as a follow-on are ‘well’ adults. Getting these things right could in fact make a dramatic difference not only to an individual child’s world but also to the larger population. We need to ensure that our children have the best health – physical, mental and emotional.
On a recent Jonathan Ross programme I heard an interview with the celebrity chef, Jamie Oliver. Ross was questioning him about the reasons behind him promoting healthy eating in schools and whether it was genuinely about children. Part of Oliver’s reply was about the huge portions that children now get and he commented ‘how long can we continue to feed our kids crap each day and not call it child abuse.’ This really struck a chord with me as it is not just the issue of being fed unhealthy food (laden in fat, sugar and salt) as a child it is also all the emotional issues surrounding that and how it trickles sub-consciously into adulthood. Giving Food for rewards, removing food for punishments, overeating due to portion sizes given, not knowing what a good portion size is, being told to eat up everything, comments about weight from other kids and adults all create a warped reality around the role food and healthy eating should play. These are the very things which create the triggers for overeating and create a growing phenomenon of people searching more for quick fixes through fad diets, medication and surgery. While this may bring the initial results desired it often also brings with it more problems[ix] while never actually addressing the key emotional issues which trigger the desire in the first place. An approach that is able to deal with all aspects of our lives is much more effective in the long run.
Imagine if we were able to deal with emotional problems in a positive way and before they became entrenched. In the 1930’s Edward Bach created a system of flower remedies which did just this. Bach found 38 essences which dealt with all the negative emotional states of mind, moods or personalities that people encounter, in a gentle way, by flooding the body with positive energy.[x] Bach Flower Remedies can be used in combination with any other therapy or treatment without side effects or interference; often they have been found to enhance the effect of other treatments. Furthermore these flower remedies were devised for the layman to use and while the correctly chosen remedies can have dramatic effects, any that are incorrectly used simply have no effect at all. This is why Bach Flowers are a perfect fit, they are ideal for use within the home and with children.
Emotions play a large and important role in our wellbeing, both physically and mentally, that we need to pay them close attention and deal with them when necessary. “What happens in your mind affects what happens in your body and vice versa”.[xi] The following are some Flower remedies which may be helpful when dealing with children who are having negative emotions occur such as self esteem and/or weight issues, as well as many other problems.[xii]
Agrimony for the ability to confront issues and joyfulness.
Centaury for self determination and self realisation.
Cerato for inner certainty and intuition.
Cherry Plum for openness and composure.
Chestnut Bud for learning capacity and materialisation.
Clematis for creative idealism and connecting with the world.
Crab Apple for seeing things in perspective.
Gentian to help maintain faith; see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Gorse for hope.
Holly for inner harmony.
Hornbeam for inner vitality and freshness of mind.
Impatiens for patience and gentleness.
Larch for self confidence.
Mimulus for courage and confidence.
Pine for the ability to accept and forgive oneself.
Rock Water for adaptability and inner freedom.
Star of Bethlehem for awakening and reorientations – especially after grief or shock.
Sweet Chestnut for release which enables self belief.
Walnut for new beginnings and unaffectedness.
White Chestnut for tranquillity and discernment.
Wild Rose for devotion and inner motivation
Willow for personal responsibility and constructive thought.
Using Bach Flower Remedies for a child is very safe and often more effective than when used on adults. Children don’t usually hold all the scepticism that adults do and so allow the positive energy of the flowers to work. As Bach himself said “Health is our heritage, our right. It is the complete and full union between soul, mind and body; and this is no difficult far-away ideal to attain, but one so easy and natural that many of us have overlooked it. Our souls use our minds and bodies as instruments, and when all three are working in unison the result is perfect health and perfect happiness.”[xiii] The key is to always asking ‘why?’ the child is unhappy as a way of getting to the heart of the issue rather than just treating the obvious symptoms and/or emotions. Image is an important factor during puberty and adolescence however it is not always how the child looks but how they want to look and how they perceive themselves to look.[xiv] Because emotional issues can lead to children and adults being overweight Bach Flower Remedies are well matched as they focus on the 38 negative emotions people can experience.
Basic herbal remedies are also beneficial for children as a way of assisting in good health, rather than processed, sugar and additive laden children’s medicines or resorting to comfort foods, which may only further hinder their long term health. Herbal medicine is made up of any plant or food which has healing properties and has been successfully used for centuries. Children respond very well to herbal medicine, and usually need and often only small doses over quite a short time. This small dose can be disguised in natural fruit juices; a mixture of herbal tea and juice is often the best way of giving herbal medicines to younger children. Some conditions can be dealt with easily at home whereas other may need the skills of a trained herbalist (such as Glue Ear); either way herbs are another excellent tool in maintaining good child health. For example: Chamomile used internally helps to relieve colic and provide a restful sleep. Externally the oil of chamomile can be used to massage your baby and combines well with borage oil for this purpose. A gentle cream made up from calendula herb, is always soothing for nappy rash. While the oil of starflower is very soothing and moisturizing to the skin and it is the herb of choice for dry skin and eczema. A tea made from chamomile, nettle and plantain herbs will support the system during such conditions. Echinacea is another important herb for the immune system improving our resistance to bacteria and infection[xv] and of course garlic is a powerful natural antibiotic which when combined with honey becomes a more palatable one.
Using these techniques alongside Life Coaching is yet another beneficial way of developing good child health. Reframing is a one of Life Coaching’s tools and an important one to use with maintaining a healthy weigh along with a positive self esteem. Life Coaches assist people in finding their own way forward in life, to create a clearer picture of what is happening, and what is not happening, which can help empower the person to achieve goals. Too often people focus on the issues that they don’t like only to have this issue expand, sometimes literally, or more negative results occur. This is the Law of Attraction, a universal law that dictates “like energy attracts like energy”[xvi] and just as you can attract more negative energy you can also attract more positive energy through reframing. When we reframe the situation and focus on how great it is to be becoming healthier, stronger or more confident rather than all the things that we are now ‘denied’ we will attract positive results to enter our lives. With children the art of storytelling can easily incorporate reframing to create a more positive world view and way of looking at situations. It doesn’t really matter if the events in life are traumatic or not to others it is how the individual perceives them which determine how it will impact in their lives. It is important not to dismiss what has happened however it is just as important not to allow a child to dwell on issues to the point that they become what their lives are about. By assisting children to see the positive aspects of events and having a belief that they are able to cope with issues, with support, and achieve goals and dreams they have set for themselves amazing things happen; children rise to these beliefs.[xvii] Such is the power of good role modelling and creating positive, supportive environments.
Any issue in life should be looked at holistically if you really want the best results to occur and this is particularly important when dealing with children. Children are ever changing and growing so care needs to be taken not to place too much focus on any one thing. In doing this children can see issues as things to be dealt with and left rather than them turning into life defining events. When the focus is on health (physical, emotional and mental) rather than weight, we often get surprising results, as we are dwelling on what we want rather than what we don’t want. Positivity is maintained. An approach to weight loss which incorporates an emotional focus, eating for health and setting clearly defined goals is the key to easily maintaining a healthy weight. The importance of maintaining good health for our children, holistically maintaining good health that is, which includes regular exercise, good nutritional and good emotional and mental health cannot be over stated.
Bibliography
[i] Children’s Society study reported in The Telegraph 5 December 2011
[ii] C.E Landhuis, R. Poulton, D. Welch, R. J. Hancox. Obesity, 2008 16:1457-1459.
[iii] Get Up and Grow report for healthy eating and exercise in early childhood, devised by Melbourne's Royal Children's Hospital
[iv] BMC Medicine journal 1970 British Birth Cohort Study as reported in BBC online Friday, 11 September 2009 03:07 UK
[vi] Ebbeling et al 2002.
[viii] NHS Choices website http://www.nhs.uk/chq/Pages/819.aspx?CategoryID=52&SubCategoryID=142
[ix] Quick weight loss schemes are among the most common consumer frauds and diet programmes have the highest customer dissatisfaction of any service industry. Council of Size & Weight Discrimination (1996)
[x] Judy Horward. Growing up with Bach Flowers. The C.W Daniel Company Ltd. 1994
[xi] Linda Warton. Be well naturally. Tandem Press. 1993
[xii] http://thebachdoctor.com/blog/lose-weight-with-bach-flower-remedies/
[xiv] Case studies from consultations by Yossarian Fay
[xv] Herbalism for Babies and Children; publication by Napiers Clinics and Dispensaries
[xvi] http://www.goodvibecoach.com/the-good-vibe-attraction.html
[xvii] Case studies from consultations by Yossarian Fay
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